Since the national exams are over, people are lining up at city halls across China to file for divorce. The gaokao (高考), the national higher education entrance examinations, are such an important moment for families that many parents postpone their divorce plans for the sake of their children’s exam.
The gaokao (literally: ‘higher exams’) are a prerequisite for entering China’s higher education institutions and are usually taken by students in their last year of senior high school. Scoring high grades for this exam can give high school students access to a better college, which enlarges their chances of obtaining a good job after graduation.
Because the exam results are potentially life-changing, the period leading up to the gaokao is generally a highly stressful time for students and their parents. According to Chinese media outlet Global Times, parents do not want to add to the stress by divorcing before this important exam.
Another reason is that many parents feel that a large part of their duty as parents is completed after their children’s exam; it is the end of high school and a start of their child’s adult life. As studies show, there is a generally negative attitude towards divorce in Chinese culture where “keeping a family whole” is emphasized – even if that family is a really unhappy one.
This year is no exception in China’s post-exam divorce boom; previous years showed a similar divorce trend in the period following the conclusion of the national exams in mid-June, Sohu News reports, showing that many parents stay together for the sake of their children’s education.
In fact, the post-exam divorce boom is so common that there is a term for the phenomenon; those parents who get divorced after the gaokao are called “the gaokao divorce tribe” (高考离婚族).
The Wikipedia-like Baidu page explaining the phenomenon describes it as a “growing trend” for Chinese parents to get divorced in the post-exam period from late June to September.
It is common for Chinese parents to wait to divorce until their children finish their exams.
The topic has become a much-discussed one on Chinese social media today, where many netizens say that postponing divorce “because of the kids” (“为了孩子”) is actually harmful, as it also adds to the burden of children who feel they are the reason their parents not being happy.
“If you no longer love each other, why would you fake it and continue living together?”, one Weibo commenter said: “It is not good for a child to live in such a family.”
“Don’t stay together for the child – it is very strenuous for them to see you fighting every day,” others write.
Some also condemn those who get divorced after being together for so long. “What’s up with this society? Do people really think they’ll find someone more suitable after being together for so long?”
Among the thousands of comments, there are those from children of divorced parents who share their perspectives on this news. “As a child who grew up with parents arguing all the time,” one person writes: “I can only tell you one thing: if you want to divorce, do it, and don’t stay together ‘for the sake of the child.'”
By Manya Koetse and Miranda Barnes
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